The Dangerous(ly Boring) Life of Jason Jolly

He felt constantly insecure

about himself.
about his future.
He was completely aware that he was holding himself down
He was scared; he didn’t want to let go
He was terrified of being blown away
of having no control
simply swept away by tumultuous winds.
He felt the hopes and dreams he used to hold on to
had flown too high for him to follow
or rather he had fallen too far to continue chasing them.
He hated being a teenager
He hated the bitterness that had taken root in his life.
Some days he hated everybody,
but most days he just hated himself.

He was hopelessly awkward

especially around those who he found beautiful.
Brazen beauties, out-going young things filled with life and charm.
He became a gawkish mess around them.
He didn’t merely stumble over his words, he tripped upon them- landing face first into disappointment and mortification.
He failed miserably at conveying his feelings; at understanding the opposite sex.
His bumbling brain was simply unable to provide him with the right words.
He never knew what to say.
He was crushed by a profound loneliness, a yearning for a soul to compliment his own.
But he was young and optimistic,
he knew for the right girl his heart would beat his brain.
Beat louder and stronger than it had ever done before.
It would allow him to find the courage to win her love.
And she would be the first,
and perhaps,
the last to know of his romantic and adventurous heart.

There was never a lack of people around him

and yet, he always felt alone.
He felt his life lacked a single person.
A beautiful, illusive entity that would validate his placid existence.
A person that would understand him; that he would understand.
A person that would support him through the bad and the worst.
A person to crawl up in bed with.
A person that would push him towards his dreams and inspire him to become something greater.
A person he felt at peace with.
A person to hold as the world sped away from him.
Simply one to love and one that would love him despite his flaws.
He did not know when he would meet this person.
Sometimes he was doubtful that he’d meet them at all.
But he was prepared to search every corner of the earth for this person.
Search, until fate and luck and effort lead him to her.

It was unclear to me when I first I wanted her

Perhaps it was during the heat of last summer, when she had shed her cocoon of clothes revealing the delicate and pale frame that hid underneath. During the cooler months she was clothed extravagantly in chic attire, her face painted to a sort of faux perfection with make up. To me she seemed like the winter, icy and frigid; but she transformed in the warmth of summer. Her typical attire consisted of shirts and shorts and summer dresses; simpler things. She wore hardly any make up, save for some charming cherry red lipstick.
There was a natural quality to her beauty that shocked me.
It was as if she had been unwrapped, her materialism tossed aside in that bothersome heat.
One might even have said that she looked vulnerable.

Her pale skin glowed and grew pinkish in the harshness of the sun.
Her red hair flailed gently in the wind, her eyes usually shielded by red rimmed sunglasses that sat effortlessly on the ridge of her cute nose.
I wanted her body against me, wanted her hand in mine- wanted that curious thing that can’t simply be taken- that has to be given.
I wanted her heart.
and it wasn’t simply an ephemeral want, it was a desire that lasted well past summer.

All I could ever think of was the cherry red smirk she had flashed me as I had waved to her absently that summer day. I couldn’t forget those piercing blue eyes. How they briefly met with my own. How I wish I had talked to her, even for just a moment. But I hadn’t the courage and I didn’t dare to approach her with false bravado, lest she cut me down with a single sentence.

An air raid siren wails out of the thick mist that shrouds the town. I watch as everything grows distorted and cracked.

blood drips from the ceiling forming a carpet of blood.
A slick mess of dark red.
The walls deteriorate rapidly before my eyes.
The wood and wallpaper stripped away like flesh-
 revealing a rusty metallic skeleton.

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The Wind

I’ll be the breeze that cools your face on a hot summer day
I’ll be the one you lean into, the one that carries away your wayward tears
I’ll blow away your insecurities and your fears,
I’ll be the draft that lifts you higher, the gust that fuels your fire
I’ll be the wind

The sky and the wind whispered secrets to the wise old earth and who buried them deep, oh the secrets it did keep. Curious man searches the soils- seeking secrets; seeking spoils.

Late Night Slenderman Fan fiction (the further adventures of paranormal detective)

I sat in the darkness listening.
The clang of an old metal gate banging against bricks.
The wind whistling through the bony carcasses of the old trees in the school yard.
The air is crisp and dry like the golden brown leaves that flutter by.
The abandoned school was far from quiet.
I shiver. Not from the cold.

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